Theory on Thursday with Meggie Tolkand

My Theory on Thursday posts are getting a bit sporadic but today I’m delighted to have debut author Meggie Tolkand, who was introduced to me by my lovely friend Jen Tucker!! As Meggie, Jen and I are all writing mums, she’s sharing some fabulous tips for writing mums. Welcome Meggie

I’m so honoured to be included in fabulous fellow mom Rachael John’s blog today. She has three children, and I have four, all 11 years old and younger. Although society treats kids as burdens, they’re writers’ best assets because kids teach discipline, hard work, perspective and—best of all—wisdom.

Before my first son, I blithely skipped through life, doing everything right. Bad things happened to people who did bad things. But one day, a drunken driver crashed into my minivan, the steel carnage missing my son’s car seat by a half-inch.

That split second was the moment I, a dark fantasy writer, was born. I realized how quickly disaster could strike randomly. It also was the moment I decided to have another baby, one conceived on the first try.

Nevertheless, post-traumatic stress disorder crippled me for a year. On a therapist’s suggestion, I started to write, and the panic attacks and sleeplessness slowly ceased. I wrote about what I needed—what every woman needs: escape, perfect security and a cozy world, even amidst great danger.

Like my son, the romantic urban fantasy The Mayhem: Roan’s Story was born from that near-tragedy. Its publication last week was a great personal triumph, the extraction of good from bad.

Likewise, many of my author friends use writing to escape bad situations or explore conflicts in their lives. Perhaps that’s my best advice to mothers who want to write. They’ll eliminate most of their writer’s block if their stories solve personal problems, ease frustrations, or vent anger.

Finding time to write is another challenge. Here are some solutions.

  • If you’re starting out, create a goal to write 15 minutes a day. After a week, increase that to 20 minutes a day. After another week, write 25 minutes a day. Then, if you miss a day, tell yourself, “Oh, well. In four days this week, I made up the equivalent of one day last week, so I didn’t miss any time at all.”
  • Take your laptop with you, and write during kids’ rehearsals and practices.
  • Waiting at the doctor’s office? Write.
  • Before I drift off to sleep, I tell my kids I visit my “imaginary world”—really, the staging ground for my next book. If an idea is awesome enough, I jot it down with a pencil and pad I keep in my bedside table.
  • When you’re driving, concoct writing ideas, and scribble them at stoplights. Order your kids to tell you when it’s time to go. Trust me, they will.

Be your own best friend. If you miss a few days, simply resume your good habits, and congratulate yourself. You’re making your dream come true, something most people never do.

I invite you to fall in love with my dream come true: The Mayhem: Roan’s Story. You can order it at or on Kindle at

My mentor told me, “Writers always help each other,” and I invite you to e-mail me at You can also friend me at, connect with me on LinkedIn, and on Twitter @MeggieTolkland. You can also sign up for my free newsletter at

Thanks so much for that awesome post Meggie 🙂 I’m interested to hear about other people’s tips for fitting writing in! How do YOU fitting writing into your busy lives?

The blurb of Meggie’s fabulous new book is below:

Ordinarily, voluptuous professor Corey Reyman wouldn’t mind learning she’s fated to marry a sexy, hyperromantic genius. Problem is, that guy is Roan Wynne, and he’s the worst kind of groomzilla, a schizophrenic demon whose idea of sex is stealing her soul. How can one woman rebel against All the Forces of Darkness to change their destiny?


One thought on “Theory on Thursday with Meggie Tolkand

  1. Look at my girls! Thank you, Meggie, for sharing your story and battle with post-traumatic stress. I know that will help so many others who deal with stress and/or panic, to read how you channeled it into writing. Rach, thank you for spending time with Meggie! HUGS! XOXO

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